Elisabeth Badinter: Nutty French Grandma

Does she look like she's a chain smoker or what?

Elisabeth Badinter’s new book, Le Conflit, La Femme et La Mère (The Conflict, The Woman and The Mother), is an argument against the resurgence of earth mother domesticity including cloth diapers, homemade baby purees and breastfeeding. Check out this article about her in UK Times. Instead, she advocates smoking and drinking, formula and boarding schools. What makes me angry about her is that she has three children who she raised in the 60′s and 70′s, before we knew smoking was bad or knew about global warming or environmental toxins. It was a different world. Also, if having children is such a burden, why have one? And once you have one and realize the extent of the burden, why have two more? Read more »

Oh, Mexico! 2010

Bahia de Conception

We went to Mexico this winter, drove down hauling our ’62 Cardinal travel trailer.  Our 2 year old is now a road trip pro and we have figured out her limits, when to stop, when to nap, when to buy new toys. We mostly drove up the Baja peninsula. She had a fear of oceans in Cabo, so we found a quite beach locale without waves and called it an Ocean Lake. She seemed convinced and we spent the afternoons collecting shells. Read more »

Effin’ Bad Language

My two-year-old repeats everything I say. She has an excellent vocabulary and speaks in full, and often remarkable, sentences. I do not refrain from using “big” words with her. My theory is that the more she hears them, the more she will become familiar with them. However, I do refrain from little words, those little four letter words. Read more »

Otty Sanchez: Mom Eats Her Baby

Have you heard about this? It happened a month ago, but has only just now come to my attention. In honesty, I wish it hadn’t.  Otty Sanchez, a schizophrenic, post-partum depressed mother off her meds, hears the devil tell her to kill her 3 1/2 week old baby after breaking up with her boyfriend, the father. She decapitaties it and begins to eat parts of its brain and its toes. When she awakens from her psychotic state and realizes what she has done, she tries to kill herself. Read more »

Mama Mentor

You might not realize it, but chances are you have a mama mentor. It may be your mom, but (no offense, mom) most likely your mom’s methods are a little outdated, if she remembers child rearing at all in the first place. I am thinking more of a friend, or a sister, someone whose initiation into motherhood came before yours. This person has introduced you to all methods, products and philosophies that you hold dear in parenting. My mama mentor is my old roommate and dear friend, Leanne.

Leanne’s youngest daughter is about a year older than my daughter, so when I was pregnant, Leanne was eager to help me out. She introduced me to baby legs, cloth diapers, EC and Ina May Gaskin. Once I had my daughter, Leanne sent me books on parenting that she found helpful. Since she is a buddhist, a life philosophy I wholly admire, I knew that her methods and my own would jive.  Now that she has daughter #2, her time is more constricted, but I still look forward to learning from her whenever I can. Thanks, Leanne.

I Want (Blank) Now.

My daughter’s new favorite words a la 22 month old is, “I want (fill in the blank) now.” She doesn’t say it in an obnoxious manner as you may imagine those words would come out. Instead it is very matter of fact twinged with a bit of sweetness, which of course is greatly emphasized by her cute little face. Regardless, the fact is, she wants something. It is as if she has begun her initiation into consumerism, the constant need to have something. It starts young. Read more »

Heart to Heart

In the soft blue hovering
haze of dawn you hold
my belly between your
hands and head, soft curls
and rough brush of unshaven
cheek, you whisper in a
voice that is between you
two only, soft and silly
and turning over rocks to
discover what lives beneath.
I laugh; baby learns your Read more »

Vaccines?

Choosing whether or not to vaccinate my baby was one of the most difficult parenting decisions I had to make. Back in the day, people were happy just to have vaccines, but nowadays, there is so much controversy around them, you can’t take it lightly. When it was time to take my daughter to her first doctor appointment, I knew that I had to go equipped with the necessary knowledge or be bulldozed by an M.D. Read more »

A Scare for Mommy

I have been considering how much I have learned from my mistakes over the course of my lifetime. When I was a teenager, I learned to drive a  far distance from the car in front of me after crashing my dad’s Jeep while playing hooky from school. As an adult, I learned not to rush and to be aware after I knocked off a stock pot hanging from a rafter while putting away groceries and broke my nose. Yet, even with these lessons, I still understood that sometimes whether you survive or not is just a matter of luck. When I had a kid, that thought scared me so much, I tried to just push it out of my mind.

However, today, that realization came back and so did the fear. Read more »

Spring Photos

This is our home. Spring is the nicest time because things are just turning green and bulbs are blooming and yet, the weeds have not yet quite begun to take over. They will; trust me. The Santa Barbara River runs along our southern border and our land is super fertile. This year I have decided to not fret over the weeds too much, but to let them be. While trying to maintain this attitude, I have been writhing internally and having nightmares of being overtaken by thistle, clover and dandelions.

Ahhh, but then there are lilacs. And they make everything okay again. I had to water them like crazy and chant spells over them this year to get them to bloom. It was worth it. As you can see only the parts with the most sun exposure actually got flowers, but it is enough to fill my house with vases full.

And of course there are tulips. You put so much hope into these little suckers in the autumn and when they appear, it is like winter and all the hibernating and dormant activity and fun can bloom with them. They are like a kiss from spring, that is why they are called two lips (i have decided).

Speaking of hope, I have put so much planning and love into this year’s garden, I feel like I will wilt if it doesn’t succeed. This is my second year growing in this location and this year I am researching and keeping diligent notes, as well as, digging, tilling, mulching, watering and singing. I am direct sowing everything; hence, the row covers. I even have the sprinkler set up on a timer for when I am gone and the acequia is closed. All organic, of course. Wish me luck!