Category: Mental Health

Get Your Baby to Sleep Through the Night, Part 2

(continued from Part One)
This is the hard part. A lot of people are totally against allowing a baby to cry themselves to sleep. If you mention it to your mom or anyone of her generation, they would think it was completely normal to do so. Your mom let you cry yourself to sleep. So ask yourself: How screwed up are you? If you turned out okay, then feel free to proceed. Read more »

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Get Your Baby to Sleep Through the Night, Part 1

flickr/peasap

flickr/peasap

Not getting enough sleep is the eternal complaint of all moms. You may be the mom who co-sleeps with their child and doesn’t even stir when baby wakes up to nurse or you have that rare child that began sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, but for the other 99% of us, we get so little sleep that when we do, we dream of sleeping. Maybe you tried everything or you are finally ready to try something. Here is my method for getting your child to sleep through the night in 10 difficult steps: Read more »

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MAAAAAAAMAAAAA!!!

As my daughter nears the 18-month mark, I am truly beginning to understand the extent of my impatience, perhaps because my daughter tests it everyday with her incessant whining. While my lovely offspring spends most of the day being ridiculously cute, she spends the rest of the time calling for me in a curdling cry, “MAAAAMAAAA” with no rational cause. Sometimes, a simple distraction will send her on her way, other times, a hug, but then there are the times when nothing will appease her. I shake my arms vehemently with insane rage pretending she is between them, before gently kneeling beside her and stroking her head. How can a little two foot person be both my reason for living and my reason for wanting to overdose on heroin?

I looked on the Internet for some advice. Read more »

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Read it Again, Mom

How many times can you read The Jolly Barnyard before a tick develops that causes you to cluck intermittently while conversing? How many times can you read These Are My Hands before you begin announcing your body parts to grocery clerks? How many times can you read Red Fish Blue Fish before you begin speaking in rhyme at the post office? I have tested these theories and have found that, although mommies may feel like we are incurring these oddities, no one else seems to notice. Read more »

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Momnesia: In Need of Public Acceptance

Momnesia is real. Clinically speaking, it is a slow onset disease in which a woman becomes a mother and can no longer remember her phone number, her underwear or what she walked into the room for. Many doctors believe this disease may be caused by lack of sleep, excessive selflessness or unnatural amounts of multitasking. Momnesia still has light-years to go to gain public acceptance. Read more »

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